Transforming Basics: Communication is redundant

Communication is redundant. We are always communicating by our actions, body position, movements, and noises, in addition to our specific words. Often our words are the least revealing avenue of communication.

Like an iceberg, the most easily apprehended portion of our communication is the 10% verbal communication; the remaining 90% of our communication is non-verbal. However we often mistakenly think that our words are the totality of our communication. Try this out — think if it as a party game — have a conversation with someone about a meaningful topic.  Take turns ‘listening’ to the non-verbal communication: the stance, the muscle tone in the face and body, the intonation and tension in the vocal cords. Then give your partner what you were sensing.

In paying attention to the 90% non-verbal modalities of communication, I find it helpful to ‘turn down’ the volume in my mind, to the point that what the person I’m in dialogue with is saying is unintelligible. This mental change helps me focus on the non-verbal.  Another trick I use is to imagine what I would feel if I stood that way.

 

May 12, 2016

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